I haven’t read this book, I just heard an interview on it. Do you ever do that with books? You feel like the interview is good enough? I do! I also read a ton of books as well so I think it’s OK. Forgive me if I broke a rule about talking about a book you haven’t read. I’m sure it’s a rule somewhere…. The book is called, ‘The 5 Regrets of the Dying’ by Bronnie Ware. I think about this a lot. I think everyone should.
Some people only have one midlife crisis. In my opinion, that’s nowhere near enough. I recommend them at least once every 3-5 years. Really! It’s so good to evaluate how your life is going. Are you where you want to be? Are you living up to your potential? Are you doing the thing you were put on this planet to do? I believe we all have a God-given purpose and if we don’t stop and take some time to look at our lives, we could miss it.
That’s the number one regret of the dying. ‘I didn’t do what I was here to do, because I cared too much what other people thought.’
Think about this! What are you here to do? For me the last two years have been a big deal for getting realigned with this. The first was my career. I was in the health care field for almost 20 years. I worked in hospice and residential facilities for people with developmental disabilities, and I did in-home health care for elderly and disabled. I love every person I got to meet. But I kept wanting more. Ever since I was little I’ve loved learning about how our brains work. About human behavior. And helping people to heal. I’m passionate about helping people heal emotionally.
My job was not completely aligned with this. My clients were dying, or permanently disabled. That sounds horrible, but it took a different skill set then the one I was desiring to use. This isn’t bad. I just wasn’t my purpose. You see what I’m saying right? I was doing the job, and loving it, but not truly aligned. So there was always nagging. Always this tug on my heart for more. A bit of dissatisfaction followed me wherever I went.
I knew that this wasn’t what I could see myself doing in 10 years. So I did something about it. I looked into and found training that was more aligned with my purpose. It was scary and hard and took faith. But the thought of living with regret motivated me. So did showing my kids how to actually live the life you’re supposed to be living.
This happened again in the last 6 months with my husband and I and where we live. It started with this podcast. The guest talked about making this list of the things that are most important to you if you only had 10 years, 5 years and finally 1 year to live.
So my husband, Travis, and I made our lists. Separately. Then talked about them together. On the top of both of our lists was travel and hiking in mountains. Which were not making a priority at all. So we decided to change that. We decided to move into the mountains. And live where traveling to many amazing sights is doable.
This decision is really big. It’s midlife-crisis big. It comes with some real challenges. But they are 100% worth it. And it’s wonderful! It makes me feel more and more certain that when I get to the end of my life I will not be filled with regret. My girls are learning it’s ok to change directions and correct course as well.
So in conclusion. If you haven’t had a midlife crisis lately, what are you waiting for?
“Life should not be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in a pretty and well preserved body, but rather to skid in broadside in a cloud of smoke, thoroughly used up, totally worn out, and loudly proclaiming "Wow! What a Ride!”
―Hunter S. Thompson,
Cyrina Talbott is a Rapid Transformational Therapist, mom of 4 girls and lover of nature and reading. Find out more about how Rapid Transformational Therapy changes lives at www.cyrinatalbott.com.